Must Read on Pocket

This is one of the most-saved, read, and shared stories on Pocket.

Recommendations from Pocket Users

Jodi Ettenberg

Shared September 1, 2016

"Some people are bigger than society. Most of us are not. For most of us, society’s rules are our rules, and as you and your person walk down your blue balance beam, you can feel the walking space melt away around you. It’s time to make The Decision.

Your relationship needs to be converted into Everything Forever or Nothing Ever Again. Soon."

Another smart piece from Tim Urban.

Kushan Patel

Shared September 6, 2016

What. A. Study.

Kushan Patel

Shared September 7, 2016

Such a Must-Read for unmarried people my age.

Nishan Pantha

Shared August 10, 2017

Repost..

Daniel Ndeti

Shared September 2, 2016

🤔🤔🤔

Dave Powell

Shared September 3, 2016

WBW: always exemplary, particularly this.

Chris Norton

Shared September 1, 2016

Brain vs Guy

Aarón García del Real Lozano

Shared September 9, 2016

A propósito del matrimonio (como construcción social, no legal o religiosa), aquí un grandioso texto sobre tomar LA decisión (o no) y lo que implica en nuestras vidas.

PD Me dicen si led gusta

Катя Демидова

Shared April 21, 2017

The gut is a real thing. And for our purposes here, your gut is the little kid in you who just wants one outcome more than the other.

The problem for brain people is that they’re by definition not gut people. The gut draws its wisdom from a mysterious place the prefrontal cortex does not understand, which makes brain people suspicious of the gut’s conclusions.

And suspicion is fine here, since your gut’s wisdom is limited by your experience and guts are often proven wrong with time—but the gut’s opinion is still important information.

The gut is a real thing. And for our purposes here, your gut is the little kid in you who just wants one outcome more than the other.

The problem for brain people is that they’re by definition not gut people. The gut draws its wisdom from a mysterious place the prefrontal cortex does not understand, which makes brain people suspicious of the gut’s conclusions.

And suspicion is fine here, since your gut’s wisdom is limited by your experience and guts are often proven wrong with time—but the gut’s opinion is still important information.

Sandeep C Kannikanti

Shared September 6, 2016

Timing couldn't be any perfect!

Abdulvahid IŞIK

Shared September 18, 2016

There’s not really any normal way to start a relationship.

Amirreza H.A.

Shared September 23, 2016

If you’re typically a brain person, when it comes to The Decision, you want to try to not be you. Because the brain, for all its merits, does not do well in this situation, where the outcome is critical and evidence is hard to come by.

Amirreza H.A.

Shared September 23, 2016

2) Turn back around and succumb to one of the primal forces. Maybe if you wait for a while, your fear of being single at 36 will overpower your dedication to rationality?

Sean Liu

Shared September 17, 2016

Spot on. Another great piece from WaitButWhy

Society, in most parts of the world, doesn’t like when a relationship lasts too long. To society, a relationship is simply a testing ground—an incubator that prepares you for The Decision. And if too many years go by in a relationship without The Decision being made, society decides that something must be wrong. To help right the wrong, society will begin to apply pressure on the couple, from all angles.

Some people are bigger than society. Most of us are not. For most of us, society’s rules are our rules, and as you and your person walk down your blue balance beam, you can feel the walking space melt away around you. It’s time to make The Decision.

Your relationship needs to be converted into Everything Forever or Nothing Ever Again. Soon.

Mohammad Haratti

Shared October 10, 2018


Mook® / @escribitionist

Shared September 1, 2016

But maybe, having seen the dark side of your partner, you step back and take a long look at both the good and bad together. You put away both the rose-colored glasses and the shit-colored glasses and see who you’re really dating: a three-dimensional, one-of-a-kind, beautiful, piece-of-shit human being.

Who’s the best.


And the worst.


And your teammate.


And your rock.


And you decide you like what you’ve got.

And your lives go on together.

Michael (thisiswilson) Wilson

Shared September 1, 2016

Questioning? Here's as close an answer as you're going to get.

Jhanz A.

Shared December 23, 2016

Interesting read.

Robert Cretu

Shared February 18, 2017

Ego. Brain. Doom...

Ash Christie

Shared September 10, 2016

Strange to think this seemingly unique relationship process happens to most people. It does to me at least.

Jessica W

Shared September 29, 2016

Relationships and emotions vs logic.

Rafael Ulhôa

Shared September 5, 2016

I personally rationalized the middle of the process and gut felt the rest of it. Looking for the best fit might leave you wanting and keep you from experiencing a much longer good relationship. But complicated subject and really really hard to determine

simon xu

Shared November 23, 2018

so many relationship problems boil down to one or both members treating non-deal-breakers like deal-breakers—or vice versa.

Deasia Taylor

Shared January 13, 2019

society doesn’t care. So you decide

Hector Pahaut

Shared September 16, 2016

But maybe, having seen the dark side of your partner, you step back and take a long look at both the good and bad together. You put away both the rose-colored glasses and the shit-colored glasses and see who you’re really dating: a three-dimensional, one-of-a-kind, beautiful, piece-of-shit human being.

Hector Pahaut

Shared September 16, 2016

Your sex drive is not a complicated character. If it has a grilled cheese sandwich every day for lunch and then one day, you ask it if it would like to try the buffet, it’s going to say yes. Unless, of course, the grilled cheese is super fucking incredible.

Chuck Alexander

Shared July 20, 2017

Your sex drive is not a complicated character. If it has a grilled cheese sandwich every day for lunch and then one day, you ask it if it would like to try the buffet, it’s going to say yes. Unless, of course, the grilled cheese is super fucking incredible.

Pablo Jorge

Shared September 25, 2016

Society, in most parts of the world, doesn’t like when a relationship lasts too long. To society, a relationship is simply a testing ground—an incubator that prepares you for The Decision. And if too many years go by in a relationship without The Decision being made, society decides that something must be wrong